Let's Get Real
testFacts on ABORTION
You're pregnant. You can't believe this is happening to you. We can help you find your way through this crisis.
We can help you understand your options so you can make a well-informed decision. You deserve to know what to expect during and after an abortion. We will answer your questions and concerns accurately and respectfully.
Women choose abortion for many reasons, but the most common reasons are:
- Relational problems with the father of the child
- Worry about the responsibility
- Fear of financial liability
- Concern about lifestyle changes
- Fear of others discovering sexual activity.
It is your pregnancy, your right to know, and your decision. We are committed to providing caring emotional support, no matter what your decision.
There are many circumstances that make it difficult to face an unplanned pregnancy. If you are considering having an abortion, you may have questions.
- What types of abortions are there?
- Are there any risks?
- Will an abortion procedure hurt?
- Do I know how far I am in my pregnancy?
- What do I know about pregnancy development?
- Do I know who to call if I have complications after the procedure?
- What are my rights as a patient?
Abortion is a legal option in Canada and like all medical procedures however, abortion involves certain risks that you need to be aware of as you consider this option. There are different abortion procedures today, the type you may have would depend on how far along you are in your pregnancy and each procedure has different considerations. Caring peer counselor at Pregnancy & Resource Centre will take the time to explain the possible procedures for your particular situation, and give you enough information to make an informed decision. Therefore, Pregnancy & Resource Centre can be an important first stop in your decision-making process.
I don't know how I will feel? If you are considering abortion you're probably faced with circumstances that make the thought of parenting difficult to face.
Abortion can also be quite emotionally difficult for women. Regardless of how you currently feel about your pregnancy and the thought of an abortion, it is important to consider the possible emotional or psychological effects of having an abortion. Several factors determine the emotional reaction to an abortion, including a woman's age, the stage of her pregnancy, prior feelings about abortion and whether or not she feels pressured into having an abortion by a significant person in her life. Pregnancy & Resource Centre offers a safe place for you to discuss all the factors involved in your decision for your present and future emotional and psychological health.
Some women experience emotional difficulty in future desired pregnancies when they find out about pre-natal development and relate that information to a pregnancy that was terminated. So take the time to be informed before you make your decision.
Our counsel is that abortion compounds rather than solves the problems associated with an unplanned pregnancy check out the "Link up" area on the bottom of our web page for more information. Legally, a woman has the right to choose abortion, she also has the legal right not to choose it. She has the right to consider her options without undue pressure from people close to her. In reality, she is the one that must live with her decision, both physically and psychologically. Once done, this is a decision that cannot be changed. Before you encourage this choice, we invite you to meet in confidence with one of our caring support workers. Know your facts before you encourage any choice. To find out what abortion is, the risks and what a woman (and baby) may experience before, during and after, also how will all this effect you.» Back to top
Guys, Can pregnancy effect you?
You & your girlfriend have been having sex and now you find out her period is late!
It's possible that you could be faced with an unplanned pregnancy?
"I never thought this would happen to me, now what?"
Confirming the Pregnancy
The first thing you need to do is find out if she is really pregnant and learn about your options. The Pregnancy & Resource Centre provides a free and confidential on-site self administered pregnancy test and many other support services. Coming with her to the pregnancy test appointment will show her that you care and support her.
Feeling scared or alone?
You don't have to be... It's Your Choice!
Fatherhood under the best of circumstances can be frightening, so unexpected fatherhood can be very overwhelming!
You probably have many thoughts running through your head right now:
Will she let me be involved?
Do I have any say in the choices being made?
How can I afford to support her and a new baby?
Is there anyone out there that I can talk to about this?
The world says that it's her choice, but most women don't want to make that choice alone. She needs your support now more than ever. Support doesn't mean silence. Share with her. Research the options together. Your voice is important.
How on earth am I ever going to get though what I'm facing right now? Fear of the unknown can literally shake you to your very core! So who can you trust enough to talk with that could possibly understand what you're facing?
No Buts about it, this is a big decision, this is why it's important to be open and honest with each other. Share what you're feeling. It's normal to have feelings of anger, frustration, and fear, but make sure she knows that you're there to support her. Running won't work. The more you avoid or deny the situation, the harder it becomes to make an informed and healthy decision. Pressure doesn't help. Pressure will only push her away and may even push her to do something that you'll both regret. Remember that you are not alone. Prepare to talk with your parents and other people close to the situation. It may be awkward, but they might be more helpful than you think.
Both you and your girlfriend need someone to talk to. Right here, right now you need someone to be both honest and straight with you, someone that will give you all the facts. The situation you are now facing has life-long consequences for the both of you. It is very important for the two of you to gather as much accurate information as possible prior to making any decision. We can give you the facts you need to know about abortion, adoption or parenting, each option involves different gains and losses. Don't let anyone pressure you or rush you. Having accurate information will help you make the best decision possible. It can also help to be made aware of things you might not have considered. Don't wait for this to just go away because it won't! Take up the challenge, get informed, remember, you do not have to walk this road alone.» Back to top
The thought of planning an adoption for your baby may be a scary, but if you are facing an unplanned pregnancy, adoption may offer a way to put off parenting while still giving a child the gift of life. Understanding adoption may be an important part of making sure you have taken a good look at all your options as you consider how best to deal with an unexpected pregnancy. The pregnancy & Resource centre offers a confidential place for you to explore quality information about this option.
Many women that have decided on an open adoption option plan as the best choice for them have given these reasons for their decision:
1. I am not ready to parent right now; my baby can't wait for me to be ready.
2. I have tasks and dreams of my own to accomplish; I want my child to be proud of who I am.
3. I want my child to have a mom and a dad, 24/7.
4. I do not have enough of a support system in my life right now to help me parent.
5. I want my child to have a better life than what I can provide for him/her right now.
6. I want to break the connection between myself and the birth-father.
7. I don't have a partner to share in the responsibilities of raising my child.
If you are not in a position to parent your child right now, you may have many questions about what adoptions look like today.
- What is an "open" adoption?
- Can I choose the family that I would like to place my baby with?
- Can I have contact with my child after he/she is adopted?
- What if I place my baby for adoption and change my mind?
- How can I know my child will be happy later in life?
In a confidential appointment you can learn more information and explore this option further.
The decision to place your child for adoption can be made anytime during your pregnancy or even after your baby is born.
Placing a child in an adoptive family can be an emotionally difficult choice. If you choose an open adoption, you can expect to experience some symptoms of grief. We recognize the importance of your emotional well being and are there to support you in your choice. One of our caring and dedicated team members will assist you as you move forward with confidence knowing you have made a personal choice that is good for both you and your baby.
The Pregnancy & Resource Centre recognizes the validity of adoption as one alternative to abortion, but is not biased toward adoption when compared to other life-affirming alternatives. We are not an adoption agency.
So you think you may be pregnant or you know you're pregnant! If you??ve had sex in the past month and your period is late, it is possible that you could be faced with an unplanned pregnancy...feeling scared or alone? You don't have to be.
If you have not confirmed your pregnancy, but have symptoms, such as a missed period, nausea, swollen breasts, or unusual fatigue, The Pregnancy & Resource Centre we can offer you an on-site free self-administered pregnancy test,. The most obvious sign of pregnancy is a missed period; however pregnancy can be detected as early as ten days after conception, before the first period is missed. Our testing checks for the pregnancy hormone hcg (Human Chorionic Gonadotropin) in your urine.
Fear of the unknown can literally shake you to your very core!
This isn't happening to me! I'm not ready to be a parent!
Will my boyfriend be involved?
How do I tell my parents about this?
How can I afford to support myself and a new baby?
Is there anyone out there that I can talk to about this?
What am I going to do now? So, who can you trust enough to talk with that can understand exactly what you're going through?
What you don't need ... Accusations, lectures, or simplistic advice to make a quick decision and "get on with life."
What you do need ... Kindness, caring and practical assistance. You have a right to know what your options are and what help is available. The world says that it's your choice, but most women don't want to make that choice alone. You need support now more than ever. Support doesn't mean silence. Ultimately, you will have to decide what choice you are willing to live with. No one else has the power to do this for you. Right here, right now you need someone to be both honest and straight with you, someone that can give you all the facts. If an unplanned pregnancy is happening to you, then you are the one who will ultimately have to live with the outcome of your decision. The situation you are now facing has life-long consequences for you. It is important for you to gather as much accurate information as possible.
We're About Choices.
Choice is liberating. Choice empowers us. Real choice means that you are aware of your options. The Pregnancy & Resource Centre will provide you with the information you need to make an informed decision. We recognize and respect that the Choice is yours to make. Pregnancy under the best of circumstances can be frightening, so unexpected pregnancy can be very, very overwhelming. Others have been where you are now and have made it through. You can do it too. You are welcome to bring a friend along to your appointment for support if you choose. We will take the time to listen to your concerns and talk honestly with you about your options. You will find the information; support and acceptance that you need to make the decision that is right for you, It's your choice!
"Sometimes the questions are complicated and the answers are simple." -Dr. Seuss» Back to top
Have you thought through you lifestyle choices?
Because a guy does not get pregnant, it is even more important for him to take responsibility when it comes to sex. You need to be thinking more about her more than your own wants or desires. Guys who care deeply for their girlfriends are seen as being more attractive. By your willingness to read this page, you are taking an important step in being responsible and mature in your actions.
Sex is designed for two primary purposes: 1. To create babies and 2. To bond a man and a woman together for life. The idea of "recreational sex" should be understood as being on the same level as recreational drug use. The experience may be fun, but the consequences are far reaching and unhealthy (check out our link on STI's). Condoms and other birth control methods do not make sex safe. They reduce the chances that your mate will become pregnant or either of you get AIDS. However, condoms only slightly reduce the chances that either of you will get other serious STI infections. Many STI's are transferred by skin to skin contact which a condom cannot prevent. Nothing can avoid the emotional and psychological impact of sex. There is no such thing as "safe sex" outside of the lifetime commitment of marriage.
Have you considered what it means to practice sexual integrity? We can help you make a game plan to develop strategies and set healthy boundaries in your relationships.
"I chose to save sex because someone told me I was worth more than a fleeting relationship; that every part of me was priceless and should be treated as such." (grade 10 student)
Growing up in this generation is challenging. Media, friends, and even pornography influence our ideas and decisions about sex and relationships, leaving many young people confused at a very vulnerable stage in their life. Many students lack the support to consider abstinence and make lasting healthy choices - that's where we come in. Through our original, interactive ripple effects media presentations, our team shares how living a life of sexual integrity can be practical and help you move towards your future dreams and goals. We would love to visit your group, school or event.
An unplanned pregnancy can leave you feeling overwhelmed and confused. We can help you understand and realistically evaluate your options.
The thought of becoming a parent can be overwhelming in the best of times, even more so especially if the news of your pregnancy is unexpected. Being responsible for a new life is indeed a big responsibility however; it can also be one of life's most rewarding experiences. In order to prepare for being a parent there will be a number of things to consider, including how a child will affect your financial situation, future plans and relationships.
If you are considering parenting, you may have many questions such as:
- How can I tell my parents or partner that I'm pregnant?
- How will I be able to support myself if I chose to raise my baby?
- Can I still go to school if I choose to parent?
- What supports are available to help me if I parent?
- Where can I get information about pregnancy, delivery and caring for my child?
Depending on your situation you may feel emotionally unprepared for parenting. This is common, especially if there has been a breakdown in the relationship that brought about the pregnancy or if your circumstances would be complicated by the addition of a baby. Peer Counselors at the Centre are here for you to talk through your difficulties in being a parent and will help you find positive solutions. We offer ongoing friendship and support, and if needed, can refer you for extra support or counseling
Perhaps, based on your situation, you cannot take on the responsibility of being a parent right now. There are alternative options which the Pregnancy & Resource Centre peer counselors can explain. We can help you understand abortion and adoption and give you information about temporary care arrangements, everything you need to consider before making your final choice concerning your pregnancy.
Parenting is not easy. But it can be very rewarding. There are more resources and supports to help you than most people realize! Becoming a parent may change the timing of when your reach your goals, but it doesn't mean that you cannot still pursue your dreams.
If you are considering parenting, we can provide information about prenatal care, childbirth, newborn care, and parenting. We can help you with our parenting support programs. We can also help you access community resources for self-care, healthy relationships and effective parenting styles.
Post Abortion Grief
Had an abortion, now what..?
Choosing to have an abortion may have left you suffering some consequences that you weren't expecting. We're here to offer a safe place to talk about your abortion experience. If you've had an abortion(s) in the past, check and see if you are currently experiencing some of the Grief symptoms listed below.
Symptoms of Post Abortion Grief
- Guilt, anxiety, or psychological numbness
- Depression (unexplained feelings of sadness; sudden uncontrollable crying episodes; poor self-concept; sleep, appetite, or sexual problems; reduced motivation; conflicts in relationships; thoughts of suicide)
- Anniversary grief (on the anniversary date of the abortion or due date of the aborted child)
- Flashbacks of the abortion
- Preoccupation with becoming pregnant again or anxiety over fertility and childbearing issues
- Interruption of the bonding process with other children
- Survival guilt
- Eating disorders, alcohol and drug abuse, or other self-punishing or self-degrading behaviors
- Brief reactive psychosis
Recent research is demonstrating that abortion can be responsible for at least some profound long-term emotional disturbances in a woman's life. Post Abortion Stress is the term used to describe a woman's inability to:
- Process the fear, anger, sadness and guilt surrounding her abortion experience
- Grieve the loss of her baby
- Come to peace with God, herself and others involved in the abortion decision.
Yes I've had an abortion, is there someone I can talk to?
"Having an abortion was the greatest tragedy of my life. Sometimes people describe tragic events as though they were all a blur. I remember this event as if it happened yesterday."
The Pregnancy & Resource Centre offers a safe, confidential environment to express and work through the emotions associated with your abortion losses. If your abortion is still on your mind and heart, no matter how long ago it took place, we would like to help you heal and move on to a happier chapter in your life, we are here to help and support you through your grief. Our post abortion peer-counselors are all women who understand what you are going through. Our Post-abortion recovery and education program is highly confidential and available in one-on-one or group format. Contact the Centre today and ask about our post-abortion recovery program. Take that step that will bring the healing that you have been waiting for.
*From Healing after Abortion: Identifying and Overcoming Post-Abortion Syndrome - by Teri K. Reisser, M.S., M.F.T. And Paul C Reisser, M.D. Focus on the Family 2002 From A Time to Speak: A Healing Journal for Post-Abortive Women - by Yvonne Florczak-Seeman, Copyright 2005 by Love From Above, Inc. (Project Rachel)» Back to top